Fragments of Ziost
by Khanlusa
Summary: A collection of drabbles, detailing parts of Ziost when filtered through my interpretation of the Jedi Knight storyline.
1. Again

**Just before the final confrontation, when Vitiate was taunted.**

* * *

"May the Force ever serve you…"

K'Surda swallowed the words in her throat, watching Lana turn away from her.

Her body felt held together by string and she tried to keep her breathing even and steady, to little effect. There was a weight in her gut like pitch and pebbles. She wanted to reach out but for what?

There was nothing to grasp for in this situation, she had to keep moving forward, had to keep fighting regardless.

 _Do you think it will be so_ _ **easy**_ _, uli'kha?_

It came on too fast for her distracted mind to repel and K'Surda yelped, clutching at her head like a thousand nails assaulted her skull.

Vaguely she heard Lana's voice and doubled over, fingers snarling into her hair as the pain grew into a searing knife edge against her thoughts. She knew this pain, like a layer of skin that prickled and burned, tugging at her insides with toxic hooks.

His voice she had no words for, she couldn't conjure them. Physically hearing him was different to this, inside it felt inescapable and she mentally thrashed, pushing against the net that tried to close on her.

"It would seem she genuinely caught his attention."

Scourge.

She could hear him and the hum of a lightsabre at her flank, a few steps behind her.

She knew this too well. Vitiate knew it too, he was just trying to mess with her. He was trying to stall them.

Pressure touched her arm and shoulder and she tried to focus on it, use it as an anchor. She couldn't return to the void. She couldn't. She couldn't.

Something gave in like tearing sinew and the pressure faded with a derisive hiss of caustic words she knew weren't actually there.

K'Surda blinked the momentary darkness from her eyes and lifted her head to see Lana staring at her, brow furrowed. "K'Surda?"

She swallowed thickly and tried not to pay attention to the shake in her hands, letting them fall at her sides. Her insides trembled and squirmed like eels, the slimy lick of nausea coiling up her throat. K'Surda clenched her teeth and swallowed again, her thoughts disjointed, not registering what was in front of her as the shock and fear skittered through her.

Lana's hands tightened on her arms, a small tug to bring her to the present before she had the chance to slip into memories.

K'Surda blinked and cleared her throat, taking a deep breath. "He tried. He failed," she muttered, her voice sounding raw in its vulnerability. She shook her head, frowning deeply. "He's still coming."

There was a terribly guarded look to Lana's eyes, cutting at K'Surda for the five seconds she said nothing. A minor twitch in her expression – regret, worry, simple stress, K'Surda couldn't know – and she let go of K'Surda's arms. "We need to hurry."

She ignored the sting, pushed it away somewhere deep and dark to look at later, and nodded shortly. "Right…"


	2. Effervescence

**The final confrontation.**

* * *

Suspended and numb, she felt removed from time itself, watching the colour of Vitiate's lightsabre blur through the air. The sizzling impact against Lana's blade nearly split her ears and K'Surda struggled to breathe, trying to stay coherent as fear threatened to strangle her into submission.

The thud of a body hitting solid metal snapped her into focus, registering the sight in front of her.

" _Go away, little sith."_

She didn't notice Theron run forward or the shielding dropped at her feet, her blurring vision fixating on Lana's limp frame.

Here she was again. All this time and effort and she was back to where she began, fighting this monster, this void of _nothing_ that once drank her in and swallowed her whole.

The feeling ebbed from her hands even as they shook and she bit back the bile in her throat, hearing his voice hissing against her mind like smoke and tar. It filled her lungs and choked her out, sapping all warmth and eating away at everything until there was nothing but him.

"Lana," she mouthed the name more than she spoke it, her throat uncooperative.

This couldn't happen. She couldn't lose everything again. _Not again._

His voice prickled her nerves, taunting her, and as she finally dragged her eyes away from Lana her vision turned red. "Enough," she muttered.

Vitiate twisted his puppet's mouth into a smile. "Ah, the failure _does_ speak…"

Her heart hammered, burning in the cold of her chest and K'Surda drew her sabres, igniting with the flood of rage permeating her body. "Enough!" her voice exploded out of her, alien to her ears in its fury.

Hollow laughter was all the concern he gave, for all the pain caused, for all the nightmares, the humiliations, the bonds broken and lost forever. Every mistake made, every shred of regret and guilt and grief, all of it nothing to him.

The destruction of her life meant _nothing_.

K'Surda launched at him, disregarding Scourge yelling at her 'foolishness' for charging straight on, and their blades met with enough strength to make Vitiate's puppet shift back a step. _Still_ he laughed, scathing, cutting at her with every mocking shudder of breath, and she screamed in response, tearing at him with both her blades and the Force.

She refused to give him space, a second's opening, he deserved _nothing_ of mercy and she had long since lost the capacity to feel any for him.

Braga was too proud and naïve, thinking something such as this _creature_ could ever be redeemed. They all paid for his arrogance. She was _continuing_ to pay for it, again and again, living with the scars inside and out regardless of if she needed a moment to breathe.

She would never get one.

 _So why should he?_


	3. Aftermath

**Immediately after the fight with Vitiate.**

* * *

Aches permeated her frame but that wasn't what caught her attention as she came to, mildly surprised she was doing so in the first place. Someone was screaming, not even saying anything coherent, just _howling_ like a wounded thing.

Lana turned her eyes away from Scourge, knelt at her side, to spot K'Surda standing out on the platform. The knight bore the marks of her fight with Vitiate, her armour scorched or cut, but nothing serious enough to keep her from standing. Her entire frame was tense, hands balled into fists tight enough to leave her trembling. She all but radiated anger and fear, soured further by grief, like a dozen leaks had sprung at once.

Waving off Scourge, Lana pushed to her feet and moved towards K'Surda, trying to brush the realization away from her active thoughts. She knew exactly why K'Surda was reacting like this but could she afford sympathy? This was momentary, a blink, and they would part ways for who knew how long again.

Surro muttered something she didn't hear and K'Surda made a frustrated, guttural noise, clutching her head.

"Shut up!" she yelled, voice cracking with fear.

Lana swallowed the swell of emotion in her throat and frowned, reaching out for the Knight.

"K'Surda," she spoke calmly, trying to be gentle, trying _not_ to startle the Knight any further.

K'Surda all but jumped, twisting around sharply. Her eyes were wide and painfully wet, a wild mix of negatives making them hard to meet. It was like looking at the eyes of a frightened animal and it cut her more than she wished to think about.

With her throat constricting, Lana carefully touched her fingertips to K'Surda's arm and when the Knight did not move she pressed her palm to it. "He isn't here, not now," she murmured.

K'Surda stared at her for a few seconds of silence, breath shaky, hands still braced against her skull like she was afraid it was about to split, before she blinked and her eyes seemed to focus properly for just a second. She looked away and let her arms go lax, half-turning only for her feet to seemingly give up on walking. She slumped into a loose sitting position on the floor, curled slightly with her head in her hands once again.

It was if someone had thrown water on the fire and K'Surda no longer felt like a sizzling brand against her senses. It was something.

Movement in the corner of her eye turned her head, nodding to Theron and Scourge as they approached. Theron frowned quizzically at K'Surda and opened his mouth, but Lana lifted her hand, making him pause and look at her. She shook her head, only earning another puzzled look in response. He didn't know, K'Surda never did open up to him about it, how well she knew what was going on here and Lana wasn't about to do it for her.

"I saw it, I saw everything, every life… every life he took," Surro muttered at their feet, eyes wide and glassy. " _I_ took," she said bitterly, voice fractured by grief. "It's all I can see anymore… I'm a _monster_."

An ill feeling coiled in her stomach and Lana pushed it down, trying not to make connections between Surro and K'Surda.

"That's not true," Theron said gently, kneeling to try and meet Surro's eyes. "You'll be okay, we'll take you to Tython, the Jedi will help you restore your mind and make you whole again."

Lana swallowed her discomfort. "And then she'll be no good to us."

Theron scowled, turning his head to look at her, and she continued before he could interrupt with conjecture. "We _need_ to understand the connection Vitiate established with this Jedi so we can stop it or exploit it."

His mouth twisted with displeasure. "Let me guess, the process is invasive. Hasn't she been through enough?" He got to his feet, turning to face her so he stood between her and Surro, quite deliberately.

Frustration plucked at her insides. "We've bought ourselves some time, that's all. We can't risk the fate of the galaxy just to assuage your guilt."

Theron's scowl deepened, his voice turning hard with restrained anger. "You want to take her brain apart and you don't even know if you'll find anything." His eyes flicked to K'Surda, still questioning, perhaps wondering why she wasn't speaking up. There was something calculating to his eyes that worsened the ill coil in Lana's gut. K'Surda wouldn't want him to know, but he was clever and it was too obvious now.

She opened her mouth to speak but Theron scoffed. "I knew I should have said something," he muttered.

Lana frowned. "What?"

He looked at her with narrowed eyes. "But you know I figured it wasn't my place, she's an adult, we've all made mistakes," he said, shrugging and fixing her with a glare. "She's been through this as well, hasn't she?"

The words stuck in Lana's throat like hooks, registering what he was saying alongside the question, and her pause made his voice harden with derision. "And you're still gonna suggest this."

How could he not see? One person's life, their mind, for a weakness in their enemy, an enemy who threatened all life in the galaxy, and he was going to let his guilt jeopardize that? If there was even a _chance_ of finding something they could use against Vitiate…

Lana clasped her hands behind her back and levelled her gaze at Theron, ignoring the look his face. "We have to try. Sentimentality will not matter if he wins."

His mouth pulled into a thin, down-turned line. "Yeah, I'm sure K'Surda appreciates that logic."

The sting was enough to make the corners of her mouth twitch. Lana wanted to believe she knew K'Surda well enough, but doubt wormed its way into her regardless.

Finally, the Knight in question spoke. "Enough."

Theron crossed his arms and Lana held her breath as K'Surda slowly got to her feet, eyes fixed on Surro who continued to mutter quietly to herself on the ground. Exhaustion permeated every part of her and her brow furrowed in a look Lana could not read clearly, orange eyes all but smouldering like embers.

When she didn't speak, Theron took it upon himself to decide. "Guess we're taking her to Tython then," he said scathingly. He half-turned only for K'Surda to speak again, her voice hard and cold. "No."

Lana couldn't help her brow rising and Theron nearly snapped his neck looking at her, surprise clear on his face. "You can't be serious," he said.

K'Surda stared at Surro a few moments longer and rubbed at her face, only looking more resigned for her effort. "Do what you have to, Lana," she muttered.

Theron sputtered as if K'Surda just punched him in the stomach. "What? You've got to be kidding me! How can you-? Don't you-?" he struggled to find words and grit his teeth, glaring at the knight's back as if that would force her to respond and explain herself. When she said nothing he continued, trying to keep his voice measured and under control. "Look, I know we might get some sort of reprieve out of this, and I know that you…" he grit his teeth again, hands clenching.

Still, she refused to say anything and Theron shook his head. "You know what? I can't. I can't talk to you right now," he growled and turned away, stalking back into the building without another word or pause to see if K'Surda would say something. She didn't even turn her head, she just continued to watch Surro as if the suffering Jedi were a mirror.

There was little time left to act but regret and sympathy tugged at Lana, trying to make her sluggish and reluctant to leave. "K'Surda," she started.

The Knight's head turned towards her. "They shouldn't have let me leave," she said quietly, her visible eye not looking at Lana but rather just staring off into nothing, unfocused. "But I was their best weapon against Vitiate, I had the experience and the right ally, and there was no time to be soft. He'd exploit that, it's just something to needle for him."

Lana took a breath and tried to steady herself, tried to keep her thoughts ordered and fixed on what she was meant to be doing. But she remained quiet and allowed K'Surda to keep talking, it was the least she could do short of actually reaching out to the Knight.

K'Surda shook her head and looked back at Surro. "I should have died the first time, but he kept me alive. I should have died the second time, but I ran away. Now I'm… still here. This can't keep happening, I can't _keep_ fighting him. I'm not going to get away every time…" she stalled to swallow, voice strained.

Rubbing at her face, K'Surda finally turned around and looked directly at Lana, her eyes a little more focused. "If you can't find anything worthwhile," she said soberly, "please, end it quickly."

There were too many intricacies waiting to strangle the words from her throat if she paused and thought it over more than she needed to. Lana bowed her head in thanks and turned to help Surro to her feet. "I will do what I can," she said as evenly as she could.

Part of her was thankful that K'Surda did not walk away with her; it meant she could focus again.

There was so little space for sentiment.

* * *

Personally I just felt like there should have been more nods to the fact that the Jedi Knight was once Vitiate's mind slave themselves, as there could have been really good opportunities to fuck with the Knight on that level.

Besides the Sith Warrior, they're the only other one who has had the most direct and uncomfortably intimate interactions with Vitiate before SoR/RotE, so its a shame that wasn't really brought up.


End file.
